Ben says no one is reading blogs anymore, and he's right. Once bustling little communities are now like ghost towns. Ben reckons that this is good, that it'll be like it used to be, when people blogged with the freedom that came with no audience, from not knowing how to do it properly, from making it up as we went along. Maybe he's right. I hope he's right. But I don't think he is. Because we do know how to do it now. We do know what 'proper blogging' is. You can't unknow that stuff, because we have been there and we have done that. It's sad, but true. That time has passed.
That's one view. My glum view. But there's only one way to find out if that's really right, and that's to test it. So, for a week or so I'm going to blog like no one's reading.
Here goes...
I got up this morning, aged 37, took a wander in the park, and took a little stock of my life. Asking myself the big questions. Like, how did I get so fucking old? Where did all that time go? Did I really want to be here? Doing this?
And despite feeling a desire to wallow in a time not long gone, when I ached less in the morning, when I could stay up later, and when more seemed possible, I found I couldn't.
Because things are not too bad. I was up with the birds, slightly ahead of the day. Breathing in a sunny day. A gloriously sunny September day. I was out with my hound. My trusted hound. Who was belting around hunting down the squirrel population with no success whatsoever. And Sophie was back at our house sleeping. Sleeping in our bedroom. In our house. In our bedroom with the green carpet that we both deeply regret stylistically, but love for being our choice, in our house. This all left me feeling a deep contentment.
Sometimes I feel it's easy to moan about getting older. To desire the things that have gone too much. But I feel like I'm also learning to appreciate the distance experience gives you. The perspective it gives you on things, on people, and on life.
I don't know if I always feel this way, who knows. But for now, aged 37 (just), it's how I feel, and it feels pretty good, pretty darn good.
Hippy
Posted by: Chesters | 09/30/2011 at 10:58 AM
I've just realised that I'm the oldest person at R/GA. That made me feel old. But, I don't mind it, I think I'll be better at being old than I was at being young.
Posted by: russell davies | 09/30/2011 at 10:59 AM
Seriously how did you get to be 37? That is pretty scary.
Posted by: Benterrett | 09/30/2011 at 11:01 AM
Russell, you just put that better than me.
Typical.
Posted by: Paul H. Colman | 09/30/2011 at 11:03 AM
I honestly don't know, Ben.
I feel okay about it.
Posted by: Paul H. Colman | 09/30/2011 at 11:04 AM
37 isn't half as old as 75. That was my Grandad's favourite gag.
He'd double an age then add a year and say "it's not half as old as"
A nice way of looking at it.
He lived a long and happy life and died aged 92.
Which isn't half as old as 185.
Good morning
Posted by: david wilding | 09/30/2011 at 11:22 AM
David, your Grandad sounds like a card.
Even though no one reads blogs, the people who do are the good ones.
Posted by: Paul H. Colman | 09/30/2011 at 11:25 AM
Very good. Very, very good.
You've changed my mind. I'm Northern, I don't do that often.
Posted by: northern | 09/30/2011 at 02:07 PM
We'll see, Northern, we'll see.
Posted by: Paul H. Colman | 09/30/2011 at 02:12 PM
I had to brush the cobwebs from this blog's URL but it was worth it.
Posted by: henry | 09/30/2011 at 11:00 PM
Nice to have you here, Henry.
Posted by: Colman | 10/01/2011 at 12:03 AM
I bloody well hope no-one's reading mine.
How old's Terrett?
Posted by: Angus | 10/01/2011 at 11:42 PM
Terrett just looks ancient, he's actually 23.
Posted by: Colman | 10/01/2011 at 11:47 PM
See, everyone's still here
Posted by: Dan | 10/02/2011 at 07:58 AM
Ah. Lucky him.
Wow, it totally feels like 2006. Hi Dan.
Posted by: Angus | 10/02/2011 at 11:13 AM
Morning, Dan.
Posted by: Colman | 10/02/2011 at 11:53 AM
And me, and me !
What are we talking about !
Posted by: Tom | 10/03/2011 at 12:15 AM
Morning, Tom.
We're talking about life...just life.
Posted by: Colman | 10/03/2011 at 09:43 AM
I was asked for examples of good blogs today. I thought of yours Colman. I used to read this every day, but I've not been on here since I worked with Ben which is about 4 years. It's still good. I might get back into it.
Posted by: Rebecca Cox | 10/03/2011 at 02:13 PM
Rebecca,
I can see why you would have abandoned anything to have done with Ben.
Welcome back.
Posted by: Colman | 10/04/2011 at 12:13 AM
I wouldn't call it 'good'.
I mean this blog.
I wouldn't call it 'good'.
Posted by: Tom | 10/05/2011 at 12:28 AM
What would you call it Tom?
Posted by: Angus | 10/05/2011 at 09:10 AM
Yeah, Tom, what would you call it?
Posted by: Colman | 10/05/2011 at 11:20 AM
I'd call it 'OK'.
But I mean, isn't that what it's sort of supposed to be, this blog ?
Kind of in the middle ?
I mean aren't I paying it a compliment ?
It was sort of intended to be like that.
Posted by: Tom | 10/05/2011 at 12:09 PM
Even Tom's got a bit rusty at this blogging business.
Posted by: John | 10/05/2011 at 02:08 PM
We're all finding our way, John.
Shit, stuff really doesn't change, does it?
Posted by: Colman | 10/05/2011 at 04:07 PM
It fucking does. I just got a new job, a new house, my wife got a new job (and a new house), and I got new glasses too (two pairs). AND a fancy new bike. Two of them as well. Same bloody kids 'though. Same bloody bloody kids. But one of them just staretd in a new nursery. And the other is in a new class. All change over here.
Posted by: Tom | 10/05/2011 at 04:16 PM
Where is Marcus?
Posted by: Colman | 10/05/2011 at 04:18 PM
And I got two kids (nearly)
Posted by: northern | 10/05/2011 at 05:49 PM
I got one. But things don't change. They're still the same Tom.
Posted by: Angus | 10/06/2011 at 10:57 AM
I agree. Some things don't change. OK then. I'll go with that. No change here then.
Posted by: Tom | 10/06/2011 at 11:37 AM
More kids, everyone still as stupid as ever (in a good way).
Posted by: Colman | 10/06/2011 at 11:41 AM
I'm here. I'm 40. I'm late. Good morning.
Posted by: Marcus John Henry Brown | 10/17/2011 at 09:59 AM
What, today ?
Posted by: Tom | 10/17/2011 at 10:35 AM
No. Not today.
Posted by: Marcus John Henry Brown | 10/17/2011 at 10:38 AM
Blimey ! I was starting to get a bit, well, you know.
Blimey !
Posted by: Tom | 10/17/2011 at 05:03 PM
Morning Paul, I'm here.
Posted by: HARRY C | 11/05/2011 at 01:25 PM
Watcha, Dad.
Posted by: Colman | 11/05/2011 at 06:20 PM
OMG... I haven't be so amused in a long time as I was in reading this blog that I stumbled across looking for a quote, today. Thanks for the unique and humorous perspective on life. Brilliant! Entertaining! Oh to be 37 again!! ;)
Posted by: Sandy | 02/02/2012 at 10:01 PM
Thanks, Sandy.
Things are a little slower over here these days, but it was nice to get your comment.
Posted by: Colman | 02/09/2012 at 09:31 PM